A Hard Day . . .

How do you begin to describe precious time with a dear friend that had moments so difficult that all I wanted to do was cry?  Alzheimers is not nice.  Early-onset is even more cruel.  

After lunch, we were talking about the Bible study she's in and how hard it's been for her.  After she's found the verse she's suppose to look up, she can no longer remember why she looked it up.  And then she has to start all over.  And she's frustrated.  I get that.  Her husband now sits down with her and they do her Bible study together.  That's hard too, because she used to be able to do it by herself.

Later, we went downstairs to make greeting cards, something we've done together for years.  I had a stamp set she didn't have that I was using to make some cards.  She liked it.  I made her some card bits using that stamp and she thanked me for them.

Later, as we were packing up so I could go to church, she picked up the bits I had made her and said, "These are nice.  Who's are they?"  Heart. Break. 

As I was driving to church, I could only say, over and over again, "Why, God?  Why?"  It's not going to get better.  It's only going to get worse.  I love her.  I don't want to see her go through this.  And God brought to mind this verse:

"8For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord.
9For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts."

Isaiah 55:8-9

God, I so don't understand, but I have to believe You ARE God and You ARE in control.